this one doesn't have very much consistency to it.. but it's a first try.

I ate a cheeseburger, and while I was eating the cheeseburger, the burger part of it expanded giantly like a wet tongue, threatening to envelop me and have me for supper.  Its pickle juice, mayonnaise and mustard lapped off its swelled tongue like a makeshift saliva.  The tongue and bread together even appeared to speak, but what it said I could not gather. It was almost like the scent of faint memories, long gone and buried in the past.  Suddenly the cheeseburger grew antennae, all over its body.  They were not biological or makeshift, they were clearly blue-silver and mechanical; they protracted from segments.  To whom or what they communicated I don't know, but I could see it sensing its signal as its plethora of metal sandwich-antennae ebbed and flowed with time. I almost thought I saw a spark.  It's at this point that I noticed that I had completely let go of the culinary monster in fright, and the cheeseburger had been now standing in thin air.

Just as I was starting to anticipate what would happen next, a pink limousine pulled up next to the McDonald's playground, and out popped, not a tall blonde, but a tall, slender, blue Teletubby. The teletubby said, "eat thee not thou cheeseburger, for it hast been infested with the filth of man's laughter." Or maybe he said manslaughter.  I never really could tell...a tubby.  At that point I got fed up, I threw the entire cheeseburger hell ensemble onto the ground, at which point it splat; but, to my chagrin, its splatter quickly turned to greenery, that is, flora and fauna, right before my very eyes.  I'll never know what to make of it, but I'd rather some greenery in a place neverbefore than a diabolical, man-eating cheeseburger anyday.

The teletubby got very angry at this, at which point he summoned a handful of helicopters, out of which popped brown bears, and sometimes even black.  They bowed their heads and said, "hail mercy."  Why my adversaries are hailing mercy I don't know, but you just don't shun up an offer like that, so mercy I did give them.  I did, however, take a quick photoshoot and got one of the heads of one of the black bears.  The national enquirer, as it turns out, wasn't impressed.